REMINDER: The turnsheet deadline this week is 23:59 on WEDNESDAY.
Anyone with agricultural knowledge to do so effectively, who wishes to take on a new gardening hobby, may collect mushroom spawn from either Officer Segal or Quartermaster Kayyali for growing at their own leisure.
Anyone with the relevant medical and scientific know-how may similarly apply to Dr. Greco for penicillium cultures.
Regardless of artistic merit, graffiti and other defacement of prison property is not acceptable. Perpetrators will be caught and disciplined.
In light of recent events, the Senior Correctional Officers would like inmates to be aware that the possession of unattached collars is a serious breach of conduct. At the present time, this breach of conduct will be punished with extreme severity. All inmates with knowledge of where such collars are must come forward immediately. All inmates in possession of such collars must come forward immediately. We are dispatching Correctional Officers to locate these collars.
Superintendent Serena Huang would like to publicly congratulate the industrious and admirable Workgroup Zero team assigned to Station Blue this month. They have performed exemplary repairs. The Superintendent would like to remind all inmates that Station Blue is functioning safely and effectively. Regrettably, rumours to the contrary continue to circulate. Inmates are not to believe these and are not to panic.
Prisoners are reminded that they are enrolled in a Reform Program. They should accordingly refrain from engaging in the types of activity that landed them here. That includes thievery. Quartermaster Kayyali has mentioned that she shall not be quite as merciful to any future thieves she apprehends.
We are pleased to say we have uncovered the cause of the recent incident with the supply ship. Unfortunately there was a solar flare which knocked out the vital systems on the ship, causing it to collide with the space elevator. Neither survived the impact. Given there is no further action to be taken, we consider this matter closed, and there will be no further investigations into the crash.
Inmates with library books significantly overdue may be subject to cell searches, however limited the value of the books in question. It would be easiest for all involved if the books are returned peacefully.
There are some very colourful murals appearing around the facility; mostly political cartoons.
Oh, and first floor bathroom, cell block Alpha: there's an amazing caricature of Winter Castell in the end toilet cubicle.
It seems a prisoner walked into the base of the Creed and killed one of their one, and injured a few more, before he had his cybernetic destroyed and he was thrown outside.
So, that one Tel medic totally butchered that Waters guy.
Yeah I heard Sho Nust was done in by Nicholas Russell. Good on him I say.
Did you hear the guy on the late mortuary shift totally shat themselves last month? Some prisoner was lying on one of the autopsy tables covered in blood and brains! Such a joker. Class act.
Workgroup Two are soooo pissed off with the amount of blood they've cleaned up this month. Through the cellblock corridors (especially near where Waters was killed), dripping trails outside the mortuary, outside the briefing room, and splattered everywhere in the vehicle depot behind Cellblock Charlie. Lol.
So a group of True Elysians, shouting their bullshit and everything, tried to get into Kayyali's warehouse. Idiots. They were totally taken down. Jimmy Maine must be seething, being publicly shown up. I mean, running into the warehouse unarmed. What even.
Huge riot. Awesome fun. Involved True Elysians and, well, pretty much anyone who wanted to weigh in. Apparently the cataloguer 'Crimson Blade' Andras, 'Burn the Kitchens' Keegan, and Scuzz Anderson (revealed to be a True Elysian!) totally started it. Solitary cells've been full for the last month; now's the time to do something that usually warrants it!
Did they get found? What is even so special about them?
The Tel continue to stargaze. Don't they get bored?
Apparently craft involving hooks and wool is the thing to do now.
oh fuck there's no oxygen oh no oh fuck we're all going to suffocate
Seems the guards have begun searching people's cells for the missing items, and they're being vicious about it. I saw one guy who was just caught with a small amount of Bliss - poor guy's face was so smashed up you could barely recognise 'em. Can't imagine what they'll do to the person they find hiding Kayyali's scarf…
A new joke does the rounds:
Q: How do you know when the Captain is covering up the fact that she's been on a good raid?
A: Oh, she has her own little Tels…